Iconic Nigerian thespians Emeka Ike and Dayo Amusa have each shared their thoughts on the issue of domestic violence. In separate posts via their social media handles, the actors noted that domestic violence is not gender-based.
Ike posted a video on his verified Instagram post that showed a lady beating a man. He took to his caption section to explain that without videos like that the woman can play the victim card and get the man arrested.
He further noted that many young men have been arrested abroad due to issues bordering on domestic violence. Ike wrote, “ABUSE IS REAL… man or woman. It is very so WRONG. Plenty of our boys in jail in the WILD WEST… Without this kind of videos, he will still be blackmailed and jailed.
May GOD have mercy on AFRICAN MEN & WOMEN.”(sic)
Meanwhile sharing a similar view with her colleague, delectable actress, Amusa stated toxic women destroy good men but people barely talk about it. “Toxic women destroy good men too but we barely talk about that,” she tweeted.
However, on Monday, the actress revealed to her fans via her verified Instagram page that she had been in abusive relationships. She described herself as always wanting to be the fixer, hence, why she always remained in abusive relationships but failed at it.
Her post read, “YOU CAN NOT FIX A BROKEN EGG. l used to be a fixer. I stayed in bad relationships, attracting the same type of men – men who needed to be fixed.
“I know so many women in the same position. We attract cheating men, commitment-phobic men, emotionally unavailable men, emotionally damaged men, alcoholics, drug abusers, narcissists and sociopaths. It’s like we are a magnet for men whose pieces are shattered all over the place and for some reason, we feel compelled to put these pieces back together, but I must admit, I have failed every single time.
“I never gave myself a chance to sit back and question my motives. Instead of asking why I constantly felt obligated to pick up someone else’s broken pieces, I ran to pick them up without a second thought. Being selfless made me think that coming second didn’t matter because I was putting someone else’s worthiness first and in the end, rank doesn’t matter, right?
“I realized that the reason I was attracting these types of men was because I believed I could save them. As selfless, thoughtful, giving women, we think we will be “that woman”-the one who will change them. We think we can turn a cheater into a loyal boyfriend. We think we can help him walk away from the drugs and alcohol. We believe we can help him get over his commitment issues and aim for a stable future with us. We trust that we can get rid of the emotional baggage that he has been carrying for years.
“We attract these men because we believe they need us and to leave them would be selfish, insensitive and ruthless. The sad news is, we constantly blame ourselves when they don’t change. Every time they fail us, we think it’s because we failed them. Their hold on us becomes stronger; they keep us around knowing they have nothing to offer. It’s just my view, if that relationship or marriage is toxic, please move!”